I just remembered that I am technically affiliated with a university, and thus can uninstall my very legit version of Word 2013 and install a brand new proper legit version of Word 365

I'm moving up in the word

Every once in a while I think back to when I procrastinated writing my thesis on Civilization 4 by playing Civilization 4

Uni: send an email to your respective advisers to let them know you're alive & initiate contact
Me: I don't know what to write in this email
Me, in the email: I don't know what to write in this email, but I suspect you know how to proceed from here

tfw you just go
"I hold this to be self-evident, and I dare you to argue otherwise"

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now, how to convey that institutions of higher learning might, in some aspect, be of didactic significance

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It amuses me that one note of feedback I got on this draft of my essay on how Humboldtian ideals are largely forgotten in the actual practices of modern academia is that I do not specify how this relates to the overall subject matter of the course: adult learning. more specifically, that I do not specify how the notion of adult learning is relevant to the institution at play

there is something beautifully recursive about it

I still remember that survey
it asked why I chose that uni in particular, and listed a wide range of options, most of them flattering and strategically useful to be able to say the students said were the reason
I wrote in "because I live here, and it's a big plus not having to move to get an edumacation"
still makes me chuckle, it sure does

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For a moment I thought it was some sort of "hey, we noticed you've written five theses within the confines of our pedagogic practice, do you, like, have any input on it?" line of inquiry

It never is

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Today I got a big letter from the university. The envelope boldly proclaimed it came from the top brass, the VCs office itself, and thus had to be important, maybe even life changing. Why else would they send a letter to lil' old me?
It contained a commemorative plastic tray, as a thank you gift for filling out the alumni survey

Pros: I got in, hacker style
Cons: since I got in, I now have to take writing this last, final master thesis way more seriously than I did five minutes ago
Pros: I got in to the master thesis writing course

sometimes I think about how that thesis proposal I sent in a couple of weeks back included the phrase "how can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?"

aw yiss
someone cited my thesis in a scientific article
I am become science, one of the many gigantic shoulders to get a foothold upon

okay, gotta send in this thing. how to phrase this email?
*thinks long and hard*
Attaching thesis proposal, as per instruction.
Best regards,"

The key to writing a long text is to divide it into small segments that can't quite contain what's supposed to go in them

Me: ah yes, another course where the main goal is to write an essay. I can safely postpone efforting until the deadline looms closer
Course: in this module, we will focus specifically on the gradual refinement of an essay from idea to finished text, with many & frequent check-ins along the way
Me: ...bismillah noooo!

some fun philosophical time travel shenanigans 

what if Aristotle's name was given in jest, as an act of mockery?

become the interdisciplinary powerhouse you want to see between the worlds

"but why would you want to avoid graduating?"
once you graduate, you've graduated

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how to be actively non-productive 

I vaguely remember posting this here a while back, but I reckon the combo of new users and water under bridges might make for a renewed relevance. thus:
how to avoid accidentally graduating, a cavalcade of weaponized self-sabotage strategies

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