Stammering is so f*ing frustrating. Messes up any self esteem I have left; makes me feel the /speaking is so natural and everyone does it even toddlers and yet you can't/ kind of worthlessness. Constantly reminded of it by my own mind because speaking is the primary way I communicate. Underdeveloped communication abilities as the alternative to hiding in a dark room all these years was constant mental pain. I want to cry under the stars right now but the climate outside doesn't allow.