Dear hiring committee members,
Your insistence that you are "not hiring for any tenure track positions in bioethics at the moment," is an interesting opening gambit in our negotiations, and I applaud your persistence on this point after so many emails
My counter-offer, that you are indeed hiring a tenure track professor and compensating very generously, remains firm, however I am willing to haggle over the following minor points ...
Mention of alcohol ; Story of Canada
My friend and I had an idea for a podcast of weird stories that happened in Canada, like the "Club of 7 Sponges" which were a club of writers in Montreal that would go around the bars on Saint-Denis Street and drink as much as they could and write at the same time.
~ Cap 'n Bucky's Big Gay Wedding ~
Act 1 scene 1
INTERIOR BEDROOM / DAY
Cap: Bucky my love, I dreamed that Thanos had killed you!
Bucky: Shh, it was all a bad dream
Cap: I also dreamed that we had to constantly exchange conspicuously heterosexual anecdotes
Bucky: Oh you silly one, of course not
Cap and Bucky together: Because we have a big gay wedding to plan!
🎶 [Upbeat music starts playing because yes THIS IS A MUSICAL] 🎶
"I'm the research fairy, here to make your academic problems disappear"
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