The research fairy 🌈 @bgcarlisle@scholar.social

Dear hiring committee members,

Your insistence that you are "not hiring for any tenure track positions in bioethics at the moment," is an interesting opening gambit in our negotiations, and I applaud your persistence on this point after so many emails

My counter-offer, that you are indeed hiring a tenure track professor and compensating very generously, remains firm, however I am willing to haggle over the following minor points ...

I estimate that over 600k patients have been enrolled in clinical trials that were terminated, suspended or withdrawn due to Covid-19

https://covid19.bgcarlisle.com/published/full-report-2020-06-06.html

#ResearchEthics #Bioethics

Backing up the aforementioned backuppier hard disc

To the backuppiest disc yet!

The only thing good to come out of the whole Harry Potter thing:

Quidditch, the sport that was adapted from the books for real-life play

I made a lot of good friends, and it was one of the vanishingly few sports that even attempted to not be toxic

But only between 2009 and 2011

After 2011 it was pretty shit tbh

Dear Corporations

Since Pride has been cancelled, I'm sure you'll be donating all that extra cash that you would have spent on parade floats and flyers and whatever, right?

You did mean what you were saying about caring about queer people, right?

It wasn't just co-opting a social movement for advertisement purposes, was it?

Happy Pride, Corporations

The failure mode of single-purpose electronics:

> It doesn't work

E.g. "Oh no, my mp3 player's internal disc is broken"

The failure mode of general-purpose smartphones and computers:

> Erodes freedoms, supports the police state, enables abuse, privacy violations; funnels money directly into the pockets of oligarchs who use it to destroy democracy itself

E.g. "Oh no, Zuckerberg's donation means he gets to set de facto healthcare policy"

Hey techbros

I know a few of you still follow me

Instead of inventing a new way to make me click an ad

Invent a feature phone that works with Signal

( Don't reply to well-actually me about your fave encrypted messenger)