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Etiquette 

Before jumping into someone else's mentions:

✅ Am I being contrarian?
✅ Do I already have a relationship with this person, or am I being inappropriately familiar?
✅ Am I "ironically" doing exactly what this person just said not to do?
✅ Am I derailing another legitimate discussion in order to get on my own favourite hobby-horse or to one-up this person in my knowledge of social issues?
✅ Am I saying "Are you surprised?" when they're disappointed?
✅ Am I providing unsolicited advice?

re: Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle
✅ Am I judging them when they were having harmless fun?

("I'm surprised you xxxx...")

re: Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle ...oh crud now I'm worried I did the thing.

re: Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle I really wonder why some people post in public and then complain because people they don't know interact. I mean, it's normal not to be an asshole and follow some of the points you've given, but well, I'm just interacting on a public post, not trying to sneak into a private conversation

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle I never know if I’m the perp... :?

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle The check boxes seem to suggest that I need to do all of those things? 😳

Etiquette 

@sajith Yes, check them off when you have thought about each one

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle But... isn't that counter-intuitive? 🙃

Sorry to be the contrarian here!

Etiquette 

@sajith @bgcarlisle "check off at least 1, get 1 free cup ☕ of stfu"

but srsly i like this, the positive framing encourages the reader to go through the entire list by force of habit

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle
also: am i about to explain this person's points back to them as though i am teaching them something?

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle

I only reply to people if I can help them out by explaining a fact I just learned from the very first google result about the thing they've been talking about all afternoon.

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle I keep wanting to boost this every time I see it, forgetting it already boosted it.

Here we go again :)

Etiquette 

@bgcarlisle I’ve started asking people if they want advice on things and it’s such a much better way to do things

They don’t get a wall of text they don’t want and I don’t stress myself out trying to “solve” a “problem”

Good tips, thanks for sharing

Etiquette 

@Ethancdavenport Glad to hear it! I wrote these out to remind myself as much as to be a reminder for others, so I'm glad they help you

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