The greatest trick the devil played was not convincing us he doesn't exist

It was fitted sheets

They are from hell, plucked directly from a scene by Hieronymus Bosch

Fuck fuck fuck

Me: How do you fold a fucking fitted sheet

The devil: There is no god

Me: You make some valid points, homoerotic pitchfork friend

@bgcarlisle i have embraced the absurdity of fitted sheets and no longer even try to neatly fold them

@bgcarlisle I haven't ever been able to find it since, but my favorite thing to emerge from the internet's Scottish Twitter Meme phase was a video (maybe even a Vine?) of this woman being like "so i have a tip for you about how to fold fitted sheets, see, you just grab this corner here, and 'at corner 'ere, and then ya *throo* it *aweeyyy* and get another *fookin sheet tha's nae fitteeedddd*!!!"

@bgcarlisle just roll it up and put it in something (string, pillowcase, etc.) to keep it rolled up?

@bgcarlisle the first time I read that, I didn't hear the pause after "was not," but instead understood it as "was not convincing us" and I thought whoah that's a complex double negative, what a lazy trick, that Devil.

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