vent; misogyny in tech fields 

today a bunch of guys i was sitting with in class were laughing about how a certain professor waves and smiles and shows inappropriate closeness at a female classmate unprovoked and is generally very sexual-harassy to women. they were laughing.. as if it was a harmless quirk... like "hey look at that horny old bugger"... and not symptomatic of a widespread systemic shittiness that is how tech fields treat women.

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

the said female classmate is very uncomfortable with all this and has expressed her discomfort numerous times (honestly it's all so creepy idk why she even needs to express it for anyone to understand that it is bad) yes my classmates were all.. they were talking like they couldn't even see what her perspective on it might be... they didn't seem to think that her perspective even mattered. it was all just.. fun. fun at her expense.

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vent; misogyny in tech fields 

when i tried to point this out i just got laughed at and accused of being outraged at a harmless thing

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vent; misogyny in tech fields 

and i feel so silly now because all this time that I've been here I've tried to fucking hard to assimilate and blend in only to feel more alienated and now i just feel like that'll never ever happen because they'll always treat me like an "other" and the only way that i can "blend in" will be on their terms...

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vent; misogyny in tech fields 

...where i just behave like I'm expected to behave and not complain about everything and laugh at all their jokes about sexual harassment and assault like a mindless being

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vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@proust That's horrible :/

I'm sorry to hear that you're in that situation

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@bgcarlisle thank you. i just don't know what to do about this... it sucks and has implications much worse for other people than for me but the whole situation feels so bleak and helpless.

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vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@proust @bgcarlisle is there a way to report anonymously this unprofessional (and surely against any code of conduct) behavior? In a way that is not associated to you or the victims?

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@giuseppe_aceto @bgcarlisle i don't know. i don't even know if there is a code of conduct for professors -- this kind of behaviour is so common. most profs are like this -- singling out girls and trying to get close in this unnerving way (almost like a fucked up version of old-fashioned courtship) that is so hard to explain yet every one of us feels it and I'm so sure that if anyone complained it'll just be passed of as "being kind and caring".

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@giuseppe_aceto @bgcarlisle like, they way they do it is like bordering on sexual harassment as how it means for most people -- verbal abuse and touching. but since it's just this inappropriate attention and ogling and almost-touching, i doubt anyone would see it as even something bad. our male classmates certainly don't. all our professors (who are all men btw) most definitely don't, even the ones who don't do it.

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@proust @giuseppe_aceto That's so gross

And it makes it that much harder that you have to even get people to the point where they admit that there's something wrong :/

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@bgcarlisle @giuseppe_aceto yes exactly. and then there's also this general opinion that tech field men are being victimized due to false, "trivial" accusations by women "aimed at getting more advantages than women already have over men". which is... just so incredible that i can't even laugh.

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@proust @bgcarlisle mmm is there some public news venue that could be used to surface this issue? A an anonymous article explaining the profs that what they're doing, possibly in good faith, is actually harmful for their students and for the future of their faculty (STEM usually struggle in recruiting non-male students). Without naming specific professors, but highlighting that this is building a bad reputation and should stop.

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@proust @bgcarlisle this way you can at least start creating more general attention to the situation and also provide a warning, before possibly escalating it. Also, probably management understands "bad publicity and less enrollments" better than "safe environment and nondiscrimination". Just ideas, I'm not an expert on these issues.

vent; misogyny in tech fields 

@giuseppe_aceto yeah i suppose... i'm really dubious about how such a thing will roll out though. all of this seems so systemic, even in larger society outside of academia. the only places where this even counts as harassment are women's circles and.. mastodon, i guess. so i don't think anybody will condemn my college for its toxic environment for women. the student body is like.. 95% men anyway and that number only goes up for faculty. that's why i said... bleak.

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